A Broken Heart Is Blind
by emiliciouslove
Summary: Sequel to Call It Anything But Love! For the second time in her life Allison Jace found herself wishing that she could forget she ever met Steve McGarrett. However, now that there's a child involved, things are slightly more complicated. Will Allison get what she believes is best for herself and her son? Or will Steve be able to win her back once again? Steve/OC
1. Chapter 1

Allison Jace sat on the couch in a safe house gently rocking her son as he slept in his baby swing. Two weeks after giving birth things had become quite chaotic in their lives and Allison was grateful for a quiet moment to catch her breath.

Due to Wo Fat's escape, Allison and Sawyer had been rushed to a safe house as soon as they were released from the hospital. They weren't his main target, but Allison's current ex-boyfriend and Sawyer's father, Steve McGarrett, feared that if he didn't keep them under police protection, the criminal would use them as leverage to get what he really wanted, Steve's mother. Allison wasn't thrilled about the situation, having police outside the door all the time or following her whenever she left the house made her feel more like a criminal than someone being protected, but she also understood the danger and wanted to keep her son safe.

However, it took Wo Fat no time at all to find Doris McGarrett and even though she made it out of the encounter completely unharmed, Steve felt it would be best for her to once again go into hiding. Allison was somewhat relieved by this, but slightly concerned as well. Sure, Wo Fat's attention could be drawn away from Hawaii without Shelburne around, but it could go the other way as well and Steve's fear of Allison and Sawyer being used could also become a reality. However, Allison knew that Steve was doing everything in his power to make sure they were safe so, knowing how sensitive little Sawyer was to her moods, she tried to keep a positive attitude.

Other than that, the first two weeks of Sawyer's life had gone quite smoothly. After seeing the look on Steve's face the first time he held his son, Allison knew there was no way she could stick with her plan to keep them apart. This didn't change the fact that Allison was still upset with Steve for breaking his promise, but it did change her plan to move back to the mainland...for now. Allison wasn't just keeping Steve in the doghouse because he hurt her feelings. The bigger reason was to put distance between them, distance that would make it easier if Steve ever pulled another stunt that made Allison question her decision to let him be in their son's life. If Allison ever felt that she had to leave to keep Sawyer safe and happy, she wanted to be able to do so without her personal feelings clouding her judgement.

However, she had found it nice to have Steve around to help with the baby. Her parents had stayed as long as they could, but they had unfortunately had to leave a week after Sawyer was born. When they first told her, Allison was thrown into a panic, but they both reassured her that she would be fine.

"Babies are made to withstand first time parents," Her mother had promised her. "A few mistakes here and there won't hurt him. And you're doing great. He adores you already."

The last part was very true. It was already quite obvious that Sawyer was on his way to being a total momma's boy and, knowing that she could always call her parents if she had any questions and that Steve would drop absolutely anything if she desperately needed his help, Allison realized she would be okay without constant guidance from her parents. Sawyer was a fairly easy baby anyway. He never hesitated to let them know when there was something he needed, but he was usually content to simply relax in his swing or in the arms of one of his parents.

Allison was pulled out of her thoughts a few moments later by her phone vibrating on the table. She carefully stopped rocking the swing, checked the caller ID and, with a sigh, she answered.

"Hello, Steven."

"Hey, Ally," He replied, ignoring her unenthusiastic response. "How's my boy doing?"

She couldn't help, but smile at that. Steve was every bit as good a father as he promised her he would be and calls like this were not unusual.

"He's good," She told him, looking down at their son. He blinked slowly up at her as he began to wake, probably due to the fact that she had stopped rocking him. "He's just waking up from a little nap,"

"Awe," She could practically hear Steve smile through the phone. "Well tell him that his daddy loves him for me,"

"I will," Allison promised suddenly growing suspicious about why he called. Usually, when he called to check up on Sawyer, he wanted to know about every detail of their day. How much he'd eaten, how much he'd cried, if he was sleeping well and he usually threw in a question or two about how Allison was doing as well. However, Allison didn't have to wait long before she realized his true purpose for calling.

"So, I was wondering if you wanted to come out for dinner tonight?" He asked, causing Allison to sigh. But before she could say no and politely remind him that they were no longer a couple and should not be going out on dates, he continued. "I don't mean just the two of us," He clarified. "The whole team's going and they'd all like to see you."

"I'd like to see them too," Allison admitted, the tension easing once she knew it wasn't a date. "But what about Sawyer? I'm not leaving him with a babysitter at this age."

"Of course not," Steve agreed, sounding almost offended that she had assumed he was suggesting such a thing. "I figured we could bring him."

"To a busy restaurant?" Allison asked, her tone revealing her distaste of the idea. "Steve, he's still getting used to all the new sounds in the world. I mean, he gets upset if I put the TV on too loud..."

"People take babies to restaurants all the time," He assured her. "He'll be fine. It might even be good for him."

Allison sighed, looking down at Sawyer as he looked back up at her, still dopey eyed from his nap.

"Okay, we'll come." She decided. "But if he gets too upset and fussy, I'm bringing him home."

"Of course," Steve agreed. "I'll pick you guys up around eight, okay?"

Allison accepted his offer before hanging up the phone and turning her attention back to her son.

* * *

"Where's my favourite little guy?" Steve shouted into the safe house when he arrived that evening.

Allison smiled as she looked down at Sawyer and saw his head shift as his eyes darted around the room, looking for the familiar voice.

"He's in here," She called back just as Steve appeared in the living room.

He made a beeline for his son and quickly scooped him up out of the swing, cradling him against his chest as Sawyer gurgled happily.

"I missed you today," Steve cooed at the tiny baby in his arms. "But daddy saved the day, just like always."

"So you had a good day?" Allison asked as she put a few things in a diaper bag.

"Pretty typical," He said with a shrug. "A hostage situation, a car chase, you know, the usual."

Allison rolled her eyes, but smiled.

"Well I'm glad you caught the bad guy,"

"Me too," Steve agreed. "Anyway, how was your day?"

"It was fine," Allison assured him. "Sawyer slept for most of it and wasn't too fussy when he was awake."

"Awe, you're such a good boy," Steve said to his son in the typical baby voice that even the toughest Seals can't resist using before turning back to Allison. "And you're doing okay without your mom?"

"Yeah," Allison shrugged. "It gets hard sometimes, but I'm adjusting and we'll be fine."

"Of course you will." Steve agreed. "You're a great mom,"

Allison felt her cheeks burn slightly at his compliment as she walked towards them with the now fully packed diaper bag.

"Thanks,"

"So do you have everything?" Steve asked, the blush on her cheeks not going unnoticed.

"Yeah and I fed him just before you got here so he should be good for a while," She told Steve as she picked up the car seat.

Steve nodded and carried his son as he followed her out to his truck.

* * *

As Steve and Allison walked across the parking lot they saw a car pull up in front of the restaurant. As they got closer, Allison saw Kono get out of the passenger side after a rather nice looking man had run around to open her door. They exchanged a quick kiss goodbye before the man got back in the car and drove off.

"Hey Kono!" Allison called over, catching the other woman's attention as they caught up to her. "Who was that hot piece of ass?"

"Adam Noshimuri," Steve informed her before Kono could speak. "The up and coming leader of the Yakuza."

"And he's your boyfriend?" Allison asked, ignoring Steve's obvious distaste for the man.

Kono's cheeks were pink as she shrugged before answering.

"I guess so, yeah."

"He's really cute!" Allison smiled. "Good choice,"

"He tried to kill me a few weeks ago," Steve told her, obviously not impressed with Allison's lack of response to his earlier statement. "And do you really have to make comments like that when I'm standing right here?"

"There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that you deserved it, Steven," Allison said, rolling her eyes. "And make comments like what? I'm just congratulating Kono on her excellent taste."

"Well I don't like hearing you describe another man as a 'hot piece of ass'!"

"You're not my boyfriend anymore." Allison reminded him. "I can describe anyone in any way that I want."

"You're just trying to make me jealous," Steve said through clenched teeth.

As Allison smirked and crossed her arms, Kono realized that this wasn't going to end well for anyone and quickly drew the couple's attention away from each other.

"So how's Sawyer doing tonight?" She asked, leaning over to look in the car seat that Steve was carrying. Sawyer blinked up at her sleepily. "You look so much like your daddy, little guy."

The proud grin on Steve's face was proof that Kono's distraction was a success and Allison bit back her own smile as well.

"He does," She admitted. "Even more so when you look at pictures of Steve at that age."

Steve nodded in agreement.

"Well he's gorgeous," Kono smiled, standing up again. "Congratulations you two."

Allison's face now held a proud grin as well as she held open the door so Steve could carry their son inside. However, as he passed she grabbed his arm and stretched up to whisper in his ear.

"And for the record, I don't have to _try_ to make you jealous, Steven. You make it a fairly effortless task," She told him quietly. "Not that I even have any interest in doing such things."

Once she was done speaking, she let go of his arm, allowing him to continue walking. He hesitated for a moment, glaring firmly at Allison before he walked off, shaking his head as he realized that if he wanted to keep a single shred of his sanity, he needed to get her back.

* * *

**Authour's note: I've been itching to post this part for a while now, but I've been slightly hesitant to post it. However, I think I've edited it as much as I can so I hope you enjoy!**

**Update's won't be too frequent at the moment, but I have a few chapters planned out so I'll try to be somewhat consistent :)**


	2. Chapter 2

By the time they got to the table, Danny and Max had already arrived. After being fussed over for several minutes by his 'Uncle Danno' as Danny demanded to be called, Sawyer was placed back in his car seat and on the chair between Ally and Steve. Once she was sure that Sawyer was comfortable and content, Allison turned back to the conversation.

"So we're just waiting for Kamekona and Chin?" She asked, noticing they were the only two missing.

"Chin's already here," Danny informed her. "He's over there."

Allison looked in the direction he was pointing and saw Chin standing alone on the beach, looking out over the water.

"Poor guy," She said sadly. "Does anyone mind if I go and talk to him?"

Her question was met with shaking heads.

"I was just about to do that myself, but you can take the first shift," Danny told her before taking a sip of his beer.

Allison nodded before pushing her chair back and heading towards her heartbroken friend.

"Chin, I'm so sorry," She said quietly as she stood beside him and snuck her arm around his waist. He put his arm around her shoulder and squeezed gently, but when it became clear he wasn't going to respond she continued. "And I'm sorry I couldn't come to the service this morning too, but I had no one to look after Sawyer."

"Don't worry about it, I understand," He assured her.

"She was an amazing person," Allison said a few moments later, breaking the comfortable silence that had settled between them. "When I was in the hospital after those men took me, I don't know what I would've done without her. She got it, you know? She understood that I didn't need to be babied like Steve and the nurses thought and she put up with all my whining about wanting to leave without getting frustrated once."

"She had the patience of a saint," Chin smiled. "Just look how she waited for me all those years."

"That wasn't patience, Chin. That was love." Allison insisted. "I could tell the moment you two walked into that hospital room that she loved you, even if it was 'complicated'."

"I know. I just wish I hadn't been so stupid and let her go the first time, when I had a choice." He admitted. "I'm so grateful that she gave me another chance, but thinking about the time I wasted, it kills me."

"You did what you thought was right, what you thought you had to do to protect her," Allison assured him. "I get it completely and I'm sure Malia did too."

"I know you do, but don't make the same mistake I did, Ally."

Allison sighed, understanding what he was trying to say, and dropped her arm from his waist before moving away slightly.

"Chin, I-"

"If you love him," Chin interrupted, pulling his gaze from the ocean to the girl in front of him. "Then don't make excuses for why you can't be together. You'll regret it."

"But I'm not doing it for me or for him," Allison reminded him. "I'm doing it for Sawyer."

"I know," Chin nodded. "But there's always a way. It's just something to think about."

With that, he turned back to the ocean and Allison, despite being unconvinced by his words, knew the topic wasn't up for debate. So with a heavy heart and plenty of thoughts to ponder, Allison turned and headed back to the restaurant.

* * *

Once Danny had convinced Chin to join everyone inside and Kamekona had arrived, the party started. Allison wasn't even sure what they were celebrating, if anything at all, but as usual was just enjoying the antics of the Five-0 team. Steve seemed to be enjoying himself as well and by the time everyone was done eating a few hours later, he had consumed enough alcohol for both himself and Allison, who was unable to drink due to the fact that she was still breastfeeding.

"Don't you think you've had enough, boss?" Chin teased as Steve stopped a waitress to order another beer.

"Nah, I'm a Navy Seal!" Steve reminded everyone, his apparent lack of volume control a good sign of how intoxicated he was. "I can handle my alcohol! Besides, I've only had a few."

"I think you passed 'a few' about eight beers ago," Kono laughed, sipping her own drink.

Steve glared playfully, knowing it was true.

"Well I think after everything I've had to deal with lately, I deserve a little something to take the edge off," He informed the group.

Allison rolled her eyes, knowing that she was more than likely one of the things he was referring to and from the look of annoyance that flashed across his face, Steve had noticed. However, as he opened his mouth to comment, Sawyer beat him to it and filled the restaurant with his little cries.

"Hey, what's wrong, buddy?" She asked, immediately jumping into action.

Sawyer had been extremely well behaved all night. He slept most of the time, despite Allison's worries that all the chatter would keep him awake and even when he did wake up, he sat quietly, happy to just look around and take everything in. The only time that he caused a fuss was when he needed changing, but it had only been an hour since then and Allison had fed him at the same time so there didn't appear to be any reason for his little tantrum.

Allison shushed him and rocked the car seat, but it did nothing to silence his cries so she quickly unbuckled him before resting him against her shoulder and rubbing his back.

"Do you want me to take him?" Steve asked, his words slurred slightly.

"Um, no. I think we're good..." Allison assured him, unimpressed by his drunken state. Steve simply shrugged and started on the beer that had just been placed in front of him. Allison sighed, but was relieved that Sawyer's cries quieted once he knew he was safe in his mother's arms. However, he was still obviously upset and he squirmed and whimpered to make sure she knew.

"Is he okay?" Kono asked a few minutes later as everyone else had turned back to the conversation.

"Yeah, he's fine. I think he's just not used to all the noise interrupting his sleep," Allison said. "Which is why I think its best that we go home."

"How are you getting there?" Danny asked causing Allison to shrug.

"A cab, I guess,"

"That's silly." He informed her. "Take Steve's truck."

"Hey!" Steve protested. "How will I get home?"

"With me," Danny shrugged. "There's no way you're driving yourself anyway."

"But I'll need my truck in the morning," Steve pointed out. "So maybe I should go with Allison and she can just stay at my house."

He smiled proudly as if he had come up with a brilliant solution, but the look on Allison's face showed that she wasn't in agreement.

"But all Sawyer's stuff is at the safe house," She reminded him.

"Fine, then I'll stay there with you guys,"

Steve spoke as if it was no big deal, but Allison still didn't look convinced.

"Steve, I don't think that's a good-"

"I'll sleep on the couch, Ally," He rolled his eyes. "I know we're not together anymore."

"Fine." Allison said curtly. She wasn't thrilled with the plan, but arguing with her drunk ex-boyfriend in front of his colleagues seemed more painful than just letting him pass out on her couch.

So after saying goodbye to the rest of the team, Allison found herself carrying her son who, after being put back in his car seat, was screaming as if the world was about to end and being used as a crutch by his highly intoxicated father.

* * *

**Authour's note: I meant to update sooner than this, but I had a busier weekend than I anticipated! I'll probably have another update ready tomorrow or the day after though :)**

**Thank you to everyone who has already reviewed, favourited or followed this story!**


	3. Chapter 3

"I really like being a dad," Steve told Allison, breaking the silence of their drive home. Sawyer had fallen asleep shortly after the truck started moving leaving Allison stuck dealing with only one of her earlier problems.

"I know you do," She said, smiling slightly. "I can tell."

"I'm just so excited to have a son, you know?" Steve continued, turning in his seat so he could look at her. "I can't wait to show him everything my dad showed me. Like how to play football, his favourite fishing spot, the petroglyphs I took Danny to-"

"You mean the same petroglyphs that you broke your arm showing Danny?" Allison interrupted.

"Yeah, but he'll be fine!" Steve promised. "That only happened because I strayed from the path."

"Oh yeah, that's reassuring..." Allison mumbled sarcastically. "You still have to wait quite a while before he's old enough for that one though."

"I know, but I'm excited." Steve said, sounding like a four year old talking about Christmas. "I really miss my dad and now that I'm a dad too I feel a little closer to him, like we share something even though we didn't get to share anything for half my life." Allison wasn't used to Steve talking so openly about his family and definitely picked up a bitter hint to his last remark. Not wanting to discourage him, but not really sure what to say, she simply nodded along, focusing on the road. Steve needed no encouragement though and continued anyway. "And then there's my mom! Did I tell you that she never left the damn island?"

"No, you didn't." Allison replied, surprised by this information. "I thought you sent her away again to keep her safe?"

"I fucking did!" Steve raised his voice, obviously upset by the situation. Allison shushed him before he continued. "Sorry, but I did. She convinced the pilot to turn the plane around."

"Did she say why?"

"I haven't talked to her," He admitted. "I know she's here, but I don't know where."

"Well I'm sure she has a good reason," Allison assured him as she pulled into the driveway.

Steve simply shrugged, not quite so convinced.

"I guess,"

Once the truck was parked, Allison turned to face Steve.

"Now, you will be sleeping on the couch tonight like you promised. There should be a blanket in the living room and you can take one of my pillows while I put Sawyer in his crib, okay?"

"Yeah, okay," Steve replied, her tone making it clear there was to be no arguing about the matter.

"Good," Allison nodded before getting out of the truck and unfastening Sawyer's car seat as Steve walked towards the house.

* * *

After putting Sawyer to bed proved to be a rather easy task, Allison found herself standing in front of the full length mirror in her current bedroom. She was changing into her pajamas when she had caught sight of herself and been distracted. Overall, she decided that being pregnant hadn't done too much damage to her physique. She had a little more pudge than she did before, but that was unavoidable and her chest had definitely benefitted. She'd never been lacking in that department, but now, thanks to breastfeeding, her chest was even more prominent. With a giggle, Allison realized that the bra she was wearing that evening only accentuated the recent growth and solved the mystery of why Steve hadn't been able to keep his eyes off her all through the meal.

Feeling fairly happy with what she saw, Allison walked over to her bed where her pajamas were laying. She was just about to continue getting undressed when she felt a pair of arms slide around her waist. The threat of Wo Fat returning instantly popped into her mind and she practically jumped out of her skin before she even had a chance to recognize the familiarity of the arms that were holding her in place.

"Shh, it's just me," Steve whispered before placing a kiss against her neck.

"God, you scared the shit out of me, Steven." Allison told him, her heart still racing. "What are you doing in here anyway? I told you to sleep on the couch."

Steve rested his head on her shoulder, his breath tickling her ear as he spoke.

"I was coming to get a pillow and then I saw you and you just look so beautiful,"

His hands came to rest on her hips and Allison suddenly couldn't decide whether her heart was racing out of shock or simply because of how close he was.

"I think you should go back to the couch," She told him quietly. "Just grab a pillow and go."

However, Steve simply sighed and stayed where he was.

"I hate you, you know that?"

"What?" Allison asked, caught off guard by his comment.

"I hate you because you're making me selfish," He explained, his breath still hot against her neck. "I know I should do the right thing and leave you alone to keep you safe, but I can't. I can't because I'm in love with you."

Allison was quiet for a moment, not sure how to respond to Steve's drunk, but heart wrenching, honesty.

"I know," She finally choked out.

Steve tensed, obviously not getting the response he had hoped for, but he was not deterred.

"And I know you love me," He placed another soft kiss against her neck as he gently rubbed his hands up and down her sides, causing little goose bumps to appear on her skin. The familiarity of the situation made Allison feel comfortable, a feeling that she had missed amongst the chaos of the last few weeks and, against her better judgement, she let herself relax against Steve as she closed her eyes. "And I know you missed this. Us, being together. I have, I missed it so much."

Allison was about thirty seconds away from admitting Steve was right, but as his hand teased the top of her panties, her eyes snapped open.

"Steve, stop." She said forcefully, pushing herself out of his arms before turning to face him. "We're not doing this, we can't do this."

Steve's eyebrows furrowed in confusion and as Allison looked at his bleary eyes, she was reminded just how drunk he was.

"Are you still...sensitive? You know, uh...down there?"

Allison blushed slightly at his awkward question.

"Yes, I am, but that's not the point." She told him. "You're not my boyfriend anymore, I'm not going to sleep with you."

Steve stared at her for a minute before speaking.

"That never stopped you with all those other guys." As the words left his mouth, Allison felt her jaw drop and once Steve realized what he had said, he seemed shocked too. "Shit, Ally-"

"I know you're drunk so I'm going to pretend you didn't just say that," Allison interrupted him, her sharp tone conveying her unhappiness. "Now you should probably go get some sleep because we both know you're going to feel like shit when your son wakes you up bright and early tomorrow morning."

Steve nodded and quickly pressed his lips to her cheek.

"I'm sorry," He mumbled before leaving the room without even bothering to grab the pillow he came in for.


	4. Chapter 4

"Ahh, ahh, ooh," Sawyer gurgled happily as Allison changed his diaper late one night. She was just getting ready to go to bed herself when she had heard Sawyer cry and been forced to make a detour.

"Oh really?" She smiled down at her son, encouraging his little attempts at speaking.

"Ah!" He shouted in response, kicking his legs and causing Allison to laugh.

"Hey, buddy. You gotta keep those chubby little legs still a bit longer, okay?"

Despite the fact that her request went unnoticed, Allison still managed to get Sawyer's diaper on and was just about to start rocking him back to sleep when she heard the front door open. There was a slight moment of panic due to the fact that Allison wasn't expecting any guests at this time of night, but as the familiar sounds of Steve and Danny's arguing floated up the stairs, she relaxed.

"Wanna go see Daddy?" She asked Sawyer as she headed to the stairs. He had quieted down, a good sign that he was getting sleepy again, and simply rested his head against her shoulder. "Hey, what are you guys doing here so late?" Allison asked as she walked into the living room.

"Did we wake you up?" Steve questioned, noticing her pajamas.

"No, I was just going to bed when this little one woke up," She explained, turning Sawyer so he could look at the two men.

"Is he having trouble sleeping?" Steve's voice was filled with concern as he reached forward and took his son.

"No, no, he's fine," Allison assured him. "He just needed his diaper changing."

"That's good," Steve said, using his baby voice as he looked down at Sawyer. Allison smiled before turning to Danny.

"So, not that I mind, but why the late visit?"

"Well after almost dying today, Steve here wanted to see his son," Danny explained. "And since I'm driving him home, I figured I'd come and say hi as well."

"You almost died today?" Allison asked Steve, not entirely surprised. "I thought you guys went fishing? How can something like _that_ turn deadly?"

"You've obviously never been fishing with Steve!" Danny piped up, clearly feeling exasperated from the day's events. "He's a danger magnet! I'm pretty sure even something like bowling would turn deadly if he's around."

"I am not a danger magnet!" Steve protested as he rocked his sleepy son.

"Eh, you kind of are..." Allison argued. "As I pointed out, no one ever kidnapped me until I met you and I can't think of any other reason why a detective and a Navy Seal would almost die while fishing."

Allison couldn't hold in her giggles as she spoke, imagining the scenario in her head. Danny, however, was obviously not so amused.

"It's not funny!" He scolded her. "We were boat jacked at gun point and stranded in a sinking dingy in the middle of the ocean! And then, when Mr. Superman over there got the bright idea to tow us to shore, we attracted the attention of a giant tiger shark!"

Allison's eyes widened, apparently sharing Danny's concern when it came to sharks.

"Did you punch it in the nose?" She asked.

"Thank you!" Danny cheered. "I knew I liked this girl."

Steve, on the other hand, rolled his eyes, not as impressed with her suggestion.

"No, I did not punch it in the nose," He informed her. "I wasn't going to provoke the poor thing when it was just trying to defend its territory."

"I don't think sharks are big on defending their territory," Allison said, raising an eyebrow. "It was more likely looking for a snack and you are lucky to be alive."

"Since when are you a shark expert?" Steve asked, looking annoyed. "Or have you been watching Shark Week too?"

"No, I just did some research when I first came here. If I'm going to swim in shark infested waters, I want to be prepared." She explained. "But seriously. Why would you try and tow the dingy to shore when you're in the middle of the ocean?"

"What else was I supposed to do? Just sit there until we sunk or died from sun stroke and starvation?" Steve, who was beginning to get frustrated after dealing with Danny's similar criticism's all day, raised his voice just enough to show his displeasure. Unfortunately, it was also just enough to disturb his son, who had drifted off on his shoulder.

"I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how a Navy Seal and a detective could get boat jacked," Allison smiled, speaking over Sawyer's cries. "Anyway, I should probably take him back up to bed or he'll be grumpy tomorrow."

"Can I do it?" Steve asked, catching Allison off guard as she moved to take Sawyer. Yes, Steve was a great father, but putting Sawyer to bed wasn't always easy and definitely not something she liked doing after a rough day.

"Sure," She nodded. She quickly leaned forward and placed a soft kiss against Sawyer's cheek before moving out of Steve's way and standing next to Danny.

They stood in silence as they watched Steve walk up the stairs, but once he was gone, Danny spoke up.

"He's gonna fight this, you know." He said quietly.

"Fight what?" Allison asked, turning to face him.

"This arrangement," He clarified. "You having Sawyer all the time."

"Steve is more than welcome to come see Sawyer whenever he wants," Allison shrugged.

"Yeah, but it's not the same." Danny insisted. "And he knows that Sawyer needs you and your..." Danny gestured to Allison's chest. "At the moment, but as soon as he's old enough, he'll fight it."

"He's only six weeks old, that's a long time from now and besides, mothers always win that stuff," Allison said, trying to sound more confident than she felt.

"Not always." He reminded her. "Steve has contact with some powerful lawyers and I know you feel like you're doing what's best for the baby, but Steve can build a good case."

Allison sighed and crossed her arms.

"What's your point, Danno?"

"My point, Ally, is that custody battles are nasty," He informed her. "Look at everything me and Rachel have been through with Grace. We've had to drag each other through the mud to get what we want, but you have a chance to avoid all that if you just forgive him."

"I have forgiven him. This isn't about Steve," Allison groaned, repeating herself for what felt like the millionth time. "This is about Sawyer."

"Yeah, so you've said, but how is not being with his father protecting him in any way?"

"Because if something happens and I feel that Sawyer would be safer away from Steve, I don't want my feelings for him to get in the way," Allison explained, but Danny wasn't convinced.

"But you still have feelings for Steve, even though you aren't together," He pointed out.

Allison shrugged once again.

"Everything's still fresh, of course I still have feelings for him, but they'll go away eventually."

"You're not gonna fall out of love with the guy if you're still seeing him every day because of Sawyer."

Allison raised an eyebrow, still not sure what exactly Danny's point was.

"So you're saying that I should leave now so that I can move on?" She asked. She assumed that she had misunderstood and as Danny groaned, she knew that she had.

"You two are perfect for each other, you're both ridiculously stubborn. But no, that was not what I was saying," He informed her. "I meant that whether you slap a label on your relationship or not, your feelings for him will still be there and 'getting in the way' so you may as well suck it up and date the guy to at least save Sawyer from the custody battles."

Allison sighed and was about to reply when Steve walked back down the stairs.

"He must've been tired, he went down pretty easy tonight," He told them, oblivious to the discussion they'd just been having.

"Yeah, he's usually not too bad," Allison agreed. "I just wish he didn't wake up so many times in the night."

"Welcome to the joys of parenthood," Danny smiled, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder.

Steve chuckled at his partner's sarcasm as Allison stifled a yawn.

"We should go and let you get some sleep," He said, knowing it wouldn't be too long until Sawyer needed to be fed.

"Yeah, well I'm glad you're both alive and not shark food," She giggled as she walked them to the door. "And thanks for stopping by."

"It was my pleasure," Steve assured her before taking her by surprise and pulling her into a hug. "Thanks for letting me see him."

"Anytime at all," Allison smiled, pulling away. Steve smiled back before walking out the door.

Danny hung back for a moment and waited until Steve was out of earshot to turn back to Allison.

"Just think about what I said, Ally." He pleaded. "And I'm saying this as your friend too, not just Steve's partner."

"I know," Allison said quietly. "Thanks,"

Danny nodded before turning and following Steve to his car as Allison was left for the second time with plenty to think about after having a conversation with one of Steve's co-workers.


	5. Chapter 5

"What is this? What are those bags? You're staying?" Allison heard Steve exclaim as she opened the front door of his house.

"Yeah, is that okay with you?" A voice belonging to his mother replied.

"Mom!"

Hearing how exasperated Steve was beginning to get with his mother, Allison chose this moment to interrupt.

"Knock, knock," She said as she walked into the dining room. Steve was standing over his mother as she ate her breakfast, but his head snapped over to look at Allison as she walked in the room.

"Ally? What are you doing here?"

"Doris invited me and Sawyer over for breakfast," Allison explained. "I assumed she had cleared that with you, but apparently not. So we can go if this is a bad time?"

"No, no, of course not," He assured her, taking a deep breath to calm himself. "I'm just surprised. How did you even get here?"

"I walked, it's really not that far, Steve."

"By yourself?" He asked as Allison took Sawyer out of his car seat. "You are aware that Wo Fat is still out there somewhere, right? I don't think either of you realize how dangerous this situation is!"

"Oh Steve, you don't even know if he's still on the island!" Doris reminded him as Allison showed her agreement with a roll of her eyes.

"Yeah and I'm not being reckless, but walking a few blocks? I think I can handle that,"

Steve sighed, obviously not sharing her sense of security. He chose not to argue though, knowing the two women would never let him win, and simply held out his arms for his son. Allison obliged his silent request and passed Sawyer to his father. It took him a minute to realize who was now holding him, but once he did he flashed his dad a big, toothless grin causing Steve's expression to immediately change from one of annoyance to one that matched his son's.

"He's smiling!" He exclaimed. "When did he start doing that?"

"Just last night," Allison told him, pleased that Sawyer had shown his dad his newfound ability.

"That's so cool," Steve said in amazement before looking back down at Sawyer. "You're growing up so fast!"

"He is," Doris agreed. "He's grown so much since I last saw him."

"He seems to get bigger every day," Allison told her. "And at the last doctor's appointment he had, the doctor said that he's developing right on track and is exactly where he should be at two months despite being premature."

"He's a tough guy already," Steve beamed proudly, but as he spoke he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. Adjusting his son slightly, he answered it.

"McGarrett," He said, using his official work voice. "Yeah, okay. I'll be right there." He hung up and slid his phone back in his pocket. "Well as disappointed as I am to miss this lovely family breakfast, I have to go to work so who wants the baby?" He asked, prying Sawyer's fists from his navy shirt.

"I do," Doris volunteered. "But I don't appreciate your sarcasm."

Steve passed the baby to his mother and walked out of the room without responding to her comment. Allison waited a moment to make sure that Sawyer wasn't going to react badly towards the relative stranger that was now holding him before she followed Steve. He was already in his room when she found him and smirked as she walked in.

"As tempting as it is, Ally, I don't think it would be appropriate for me to let you join me in the shower now that we're not together." He teased.

"Ha-ha," Allison said sarcastically. "That's not why I'm here."

"Well what can I help you with?" He asked as he pulled out a clean pair of cargo pants from his drawer.

"Oh, I'm just wondering who the woman that I ran into on your driveway this morning was," Allison explained, trying to sound casual.

"What woman?"

"The one that's about this tall," Allison gestured with her hand. "Brown hair, super pretty. How many women left your house this morning, Steve? I'm assuming she's the only one who was here."

"Oh, you mean Catherine," Steve said as if that was supposed to answer all Allison's questions.

"I guess I do," She replied before crossing her arms and cutting right to the chase. "Are you fucking her?"

Steve's eyes widened slightly as he was caught off guard by her bluntness, but he quickly regained his composure and smirked at her once again.

"I don't think that's any of your business anymore," He told her. "I can do whatever I want with whoever I want."

The words sounded familiar and it didn't take Allison long to figure out that he was using her own words against her. She had said a similar thing to him about a month previous to their current conversation. At the time, Allison had been testing the waters, trying to see just how easily she could make him jealous and she assumed that was just what Steve was doing now, only he had taken it much further. After coming to this conclusion, Allison knew the best course of action was to not give him what he wanted so while biting the inside of her lip to keep her emotions from bubbling over, she simply nodded.

"Sorry, you're right," She told him. "I shouldn't intrude like that."

Steve tried to hide his surprise at her reaction, or rather lack thereof, as Allison flashed him a weak smile before quickly turning on her heel and heading back to her son.

* * *

As Sawyer napped later that afternoon, Allison anxiously paced back and forth across her kitchen, her phone pressed to her ear. Just as the call was about to go to voicemail, it was answered.

"Hey, Ally!" Her friend, Macy greeted her. "How are you?"

"Honestly?" Allison asked, running a hand through her hair. "I think I fucked up."

"Oh honey," Macy sighed. "What have you done now?"

"Well I thought that Steve wanted us to get back together because his coworkers won't shut up about it and I assumed he had asked them to talk to me, but," Allison paused as she teared up. "Obviously that's not the case. He's moved on."

"What?" Macy asked, her tone conveying her disbelief. "No way, Ally."

"Yes way, Mace!" Allison insisted. "His mom invited Sawyer and I over for breakfast this morning and there was some woman sneaking out of his house when I got there!"

"Did you ask him about it? Maybe it's nothing."

"Of course I did. He just flashed me that stupid smirk and reminded me that it wasn't any of my business anymore."

Macy was quiet for a moment.

"Well I guess that's true," She said, trying to be as gentle as possible. "And you can't expect him to stay single forever."

"But so soon?"

"Do you think time would make it any easier?" Macy asked, knowing her friend better than she thought.

Now it was Allison's turn to be quiet. She chewed her lip again anxiously and turned to face the window, looking out over the ocean as she spoke.

"No," She admitted a moment later. "It wouldn't because I love him. And I don't want him to go off and get some hot new girlfriend that Sawyer will spend every weekend with and eventually call 'mom' and probably like more than he likes me because I'll be spending the rest of my life working shitty jobs just to support him, but have no time to actually spend with him. Meanwhile, on weekends, super dad and his sexy girlfriend will swoop in and take him on lots of fun adventures and-"

"Ally, calm down." Macy instructed, interrupting her friends rant. She waited until Allison had stopped talking and taken a breath before continuing. "You can avoid all that if you just talk things out with Steve."

"I can't," Allison insisted, her voice cracking slightly. "We can't get back together."

"So let me get this straight," Macy said. "You don't want to be with Steve, but you also don't want him to be with anyone else?"

"Not exactly..."

"Well what am I missing?" Macy asked, trying her best not to lose her patience with her stubborn friend.

"I still want to be with him." Allison admitted. "But I can't. I have to think about Sawyer and do what's best for him."

Macy sighed. She'd heard the same story the last time she'd talked to Allison and she still wasn't buying it.

"Can I be honest with you?" She asked.

"Of course,"

"Promise you won't get mad?" Allison made a noise of agreement and Macy continued. "I think that's bullshit. Steve broke your heart when he left the first time and then he did it again. You're scared and that's understandable, but you're going to be miserable for the rest of your life if you can't even admit what the real problem is."

The ocean suddenly became a blur in Allison's vision as she lost the battle with her emotions. She wasn't a crier. If a problem was solvable, she had always felt that crying about it was a waste of time, but her friend's words had really struck a chord with her and she knew there was some truth to what she was saying.

"But what am I supposed to do?" She choked out. "I can't trust him anymore, not after he's broken my heart twice!"

"I know, Al, but that's why you need to talk to him. It'll take a lot of work, but you love each other and can get through this. You owe it to Sawyer to at least give it a chance."

"He doesn't love me anymore!" Allison cried. "He already found someone else."

"I have no idea who that woman was, but there is no way that Steve doesn't love you anymore." Macy insisted. "He loved you for a year after you spent one night together. It would make no sense for him to be over you that fast after everything you've been through now."

"But maybe it's not so fast," Allison fretted. "The only reason he was upset when I left was because he thought I was taking Sawyer away. He didn't say anything about the fact that I was going too."

"Talk to him, Allison." Macy repeated. "I'm serious. That's the only way you can work this out."

Allison sighed and was about to reply when she heard Sawyer cry through the baby monitor.

"Okay, I will, but can I call-"

Allison trailed off when she turned around, intending to go and comfort her son. There, leaning against the door frame that led to her kitchen, was the one man that she had just been discussing and the expression on his face clearly told her he had heard everything that she had just said.


	6. Chapter 6

"Steve?!" Allison exclaimed, surprised to see her ex-boyfriend standing in her kitchen. "What are you doing here? I mean, besides eavesdropping on my private phone call!"

"I just came to see Sawyer and then I heard what you were talking about and-"

"And decided it was perfectly fine to invade my privacy and listen?" She finished for him, causing him to look down, obviously not proud of what he had done. "How much did you hear?"

"Enough to know that we have some things we need to discuss." He replied, not really answering her question.

"I don't think so," Allison said, crossing her arms. "And from now on you need to call before you barge in here!"

"I didn't 'barge in', you would have heard me if I had," Steve pointed out. "And it was a last-minute thing. We had a rough case and I just needed to see Sawyer. You know, make sure he was okay."

As if on cue, Sawyer's cries grew louder and reminded Allison why she had turned around in the first place.

"Of course he's okay," Allison rolled her eyes before pushing her way past Steve and heading to the stairs.

"I know, but it was brutal," Steve said as he followed her. "These guys kidnapped a little boy then cut off his finger and sent it to the parents as proof of life. We were interrogating one of them today and he said that his only regret is not killing the poor kid!"

"I wouldn't let anyone cut off any of Sawyer's fingers," Allison assured him as they walked into Sawyer's room. "Hey buddy, its okay!" She said to the distraught baby as she leaned over the railing of his crib. "What's the matter, huh?" She picked him up and rested him on her shoulder, rocking him gently as Steve continued.

"I know you wouldn't, of course I do." He insisted. "But you know, it's like when you see those animal shelter commercials and really want to hug your dog just to reassure yourself that it's safe."

Allison shrugged as Sawyer finally began to quiet down.

"I don't have a dog so no, I wouldn't know..."

Steve groaned.

"Stop being difficult, Allison, you know what I mean!"

"I'll stop being difficult when you stop letting yourself into other people's homes and listening to their conversations!" She argued as she carried Sawyer over to his changing table.

Steve followed again, but was quiet for a moment before speaking.

"I'm sorry for eavesdropping," He apologized, his voice much calmer than it had been moments before. "But I'm glad I heard what I did. We need to talk, Ally."

"There's nothing to talk about," She lied as she laid Sawyer down and unbuttoned his little onesie. He gurgled away happily to himself before turning his head and finally noticing his dad. His face immediately lit up and, despite the frustrations they were both feeling, neither of his parents could hide their own smiles in response.

"I don't think I'll ever get tired of seeing that," Steve mumbled mostly to himself before turning his focus back to Allison. "There's a lot to talk about," He insisted. "My mom would love to watch Sawyer, why don't you have dinner with me on Friday?"

"Because the last time you wanted to take me out to dinner to win me back, you used your charm to get me into bed."

"There won't be any of that, I promise." Steve said smirking at the memory. "Just dinner and talking so we can get everything between us fixed."

Allison sighed as she re-buttoned Sawyer's onesie now that his diaper was clean.

"Fine, just dinner and talking."She agreed. "However, I'm not promising that we can fix anything."

"Okay, thank you."

Before she could stop him Steve leaned over and placed a kiss against her cheek causing Allison to wonder what she was getting herself into.

* * *

**Authours note: I am so so sorry that this took forever to be posted and that its ridiculously short. I've had some bad luck and big disappointments in my personal life lately and that, combined with the lack of new Hawaii Five-0 episodes, left me in a bit of a funk.**

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed and favourited! It means a lot :)**


	7. Chapter 7

By the time Friday rolled around, things had taken a turn for the worse and Allison knew she was going to have to cancel her plans with Steve. Part of her was relieved due to the fact that she hadn't really wanted to talk to him in the first place, but the other part felt bad because she knew how important this was for their family. However, despite her internal struggle, she quickly came to the conclusion that cancelling was the only thing she could do.

"Hey, how are you?" Steve answered his phone almost immediately after Allison had hit call.

"That's actually why I'm calling," Allison said, trying to fight through the throbbing in her head as Sawyer's cries filled the house once again. "I'm gonna need to take a raincheck on our dinner tonight."

"What? Why?" Steve asked, his voice immediately giving away his disappointment.

"Because," Allison started as she balanced her phone against her shoulder before picking Sawyer up. "I'm sick. Really sick. I have the flu and I gave it to Sawyer."

"Oh," Steve's voice was quiet. "My mom's gonna be pretty sad. She was looking forward to spending some time with Sawyer."

"I know. I'm sorry," Allison felt herself tear up. She knew it was silly, but with Sawyer screaming in her ear, her head pounding and her stomach churning, feeling guilty about keeping a grandmother away from her grandson was just a little too much. "But Sawyer's hardly stopped crying since yesterday morning, my head feels like it's about to explode and I just need to try and get him comfortable so we can both sleep."

"Hey, hey, don't cry." Steve instructed gently. "That's fine. My mom can see Sawyer anytime, but you don't have to do this by yourself. Why don't I come over and take care of Sawyer so you can take care of yourself? I'll even stop and get take out on the way so we'll still get our dinner."

Allison sighed with relief as Sawyer finally stopped screaming, quieting down to a simple whimper.

"I would really appreciate that," Allison admitted. "But you don't have to worry about the take out, I can't keep anything down."

Steve chuckled quietly.

"Okay, I'll be there in twenty minutes." He promised before saying a quick goodbye.

* * *

When Steve arrived at Allison's house he was almost deafened by Sawyer's screams. He quickly threw the bag of take out onto the coffee table before scooping his son up out of his little swing.

"Hey buddy, its okay." Steve said, gently rocking the baby that immediately clung to his shirt. "I hear you're not feeling so great? But don't worry, you'll be better soon and I bet mommy's taking real good care of you. Any idea where she is?"

Sawyer had quieted considerably, obviously comforted simply by being in his father's arms and hearing his voice. Steve's focus had now turned to why Allison had left Sawyer alone in such a panic and where she was now.

"Ally?" He called out, loud enough to be heard, but quiet enough to not disturb his son. There was no reply, but as he carried Sawyer up the stairs the distant sound of retching tipped him off to her location.

With a sigh, he pushed open the bathroom door and as suspected, found Allison in a heap beside the toilet.

"I'm sorry," She croaked out, tearing up once again. "I didn't want to leave him by himself, but I couldn't help it."

"Don't worry about it. He was fine." Steve assured her. "How are you holding up?"

"I'm so sick," She whined. "I don't even know where I could've picked this up. I hardly go anywhere!"

Steve extended his hand to help her up off the floor.

"Who knows. You could've gotten it anywhere." He said as Sawyer started to fuss again. The sound caused Allison to wince slightly and Steve smiled. "Why don't you go put a movie on or something and I'll try and get Sawyer to sleep."

Allison nodded and slowly dragged herself out of the bathroom.

* * *

Almost forty-five minutes later, Steve had finally managed to get Sawyer to sleep and quietly snuck down the stairs, baby monitor in hand.

"You won't need that," Allison piped up from her spot on the couch when she saw him. "The way he's been screaming lately the neighbours can probably even hear when he wakes up."

Steve laughed as he sat next to her.

"I'm guessing it's been rough?"

"Really rough," Allison nodded. "But I feel so bad for him. He just doesn't get why he feels so awful. And I feel awful for making him feel that way."

Steve reached out and put a hand on Allison's knee, squeezing it comfortingly.

"It's not your fault, Ally. And he'll be better in no time." Steve assured her. "So, what movie are we watching?"

"We're not," Allison said with a sigh. "We were going to talk over dinner, so we may as well talk anyway. I know it's important."

"Are you sure?" Steve asked. "If you don't feel up to it, I don't mind waiting."

"No, it's fine. We can talk now." She insisted.

Steve simply nodded, but stayed quiet, unsure of where to start.

"I was upset about losing you when you left, it wasn't just about Sawyer," He blurted out after a few minutes of silence. "I need you to know that and that I'm still upset. I miss you."

Allison looked down at her hands.

"Then who was that woman?" She asked quietly, not sure she'd want to know the answer.

"A mistake." Steve said firmly. "We met in the navy and had a...thing a while ago. She was in town and we got carried away. I'd take it back if I could."

"Is that all I was too?" Allison's voice was still quiet. "Just a mistake?"

"No! God, no. Of course not." Steve insisted. "Allison, I love you."

"But do you really?" Allison's tone turned harsh. "You broke my heart, Steven. Twice now! And instead of really doing anything to try and get me back, you fuck some girl you used to have a 'thing' with!"

"You made it pretty clear that I had no chance of getting you back, that's the only reason I agreed to see Catherine at all!" Steve defended himself.

"I shouldn't take you back," Allison told him. "How many chances do you deserve?"

"The first time I left it was to protect you from what I thought was a stalker and the second time it was to try and give us a chance at being a normal family."

"Well that one backfired!" Allison snapped. "You left me a fucking letter, Steven. I can't even begin to explain how selfish that was and how much it hurt me."

"Selfish? You wanna talk about selfish?" Steve said, his temper rising as well. "I'd say keeping my son away from me because you're holding a grudge is pretty damn selfish."

"I'm not keeping him away! You can see him whenever you want!"

"But I can't get over here much because of my work schedule," Steve reminded her, trying to calm his tone. "If I lived with him, I'd get to see him a lot more."

"I'm not going to take you back just for Sawyer," Allison said, calming herself as well. "That's not a good reason to be in a relationship and it's not a healthy way to raise a child."

"It wouldn't just be for Sawyer, Ally. We both love each other," Steve insisted. "And I know that we have issues and I know I'll have to earn your trust back, but I still want us to be that normal family."

"Oh god," Allison groaned as another wave of nausea came on. However, this time she wasn't sure whether it came from the flu or the sincerity in Steve's voice.

Slightly happy for an excuse to leave their conversation, Allison leapt of the couch and ran to the bathroom, making it just in time to empty her stomach into the toilet for what felt like the millionth time that day. Much to her surprise, Allison felt familiar hands pulling her hair back and out of her face and comfortingly rubbing her back. Once she was done, he once again helped her up, but this time managed to trap her between his body and the counter.

"Thanks," Allison said quietly, not sure what he was doing.

"No problem," Steve replied, his voice quiet as well. "I like taking care of you."

"Well you've always been good at it," She admitted, thinking back to when she was pregnant. "All those times I had morning sickness, you were always there."

"And all the three AM cravings that absolutely couldn't wait until a reasonable time, they had to be satisfied immediately."

"You always went out to get me whatever I wanted, even if you had to work early the next day." Allison smiled at the memory.

"Because I love you," Steve quietly reminded her. "I shouldn't have left without talking to you first. I'm sorry. But I want to make it right. I want you back, Ally."

"I don't know, Steve." Allison sighed. "Everything's so complicated now..."

"Please?" Steve's voice had a hint of desperation, something that Steve didn't usually show and Allison could feel herself losing the fight.

"Why don't we start with dinner?" Allison suggested hesitantly after a few moments of deliberation. "We can reschedule for when I can keep food down and finish our conversation."

Steve's face lit up at the thought of being offered another chance.

"Seriously?" Allison nodded and Steve pulled her tight against his chest. "Thank you."

"Just don't make me regret it," She mumbled, closing her eyes as the exhaustion finally caught up with her.

"I won't," Steve assured her before kissing the top of her head.

As they stood in the bathroom enjoying the familiar comfort of being in each other's arms, Allison could feel herself drifting off to sleep. Her relaxation was short lived though as Sawyer's cries filled the house once again.

"Fuck," Allison groaned before pulling herself away from Steve.

"I got it," Steve told her as they walked out of the room. "You go to bed and get some rest, I'll stay here tonight, on the couch of course, and look after Sawyer."

"Are you sure? You've been at work all day..."

"He's my responsibility too, Ally," He reminded her. "And you need to sleep if you want to get better anytime soon."

Allison smiled and breathed a sigh of relief at the thought of getting a full night's sleep for once. After a quick and slightly awkward goodnight hug was exchanged, Allison hurried to bed, wanting to make the most of her night free of parenting responsibility.

* * *

**Authour's note: SORRY! I've been busy with work lately and unfortunately still going through some shitty things in my personal life which makes it hard to write. And I know these are lame excuses no one wants to hear. Haha. I fired this one out pretty late last night so I hope its not TOO bad :S and I will try to update more regularly! :)**


	8. Chapter 8

"Allison, I know what I'm doing," Doris assured her, interrupting the young mother's long list of instructions. "I raised Steve and Mary, I think I can handle looking after Sawyer for a night."

"I haven't been away from him yet," Allison fretted. "What if something happens?"

"If something that I absolutely can't deal with happens, I will call you, but we're going to be fine."

"Okay," Allison took a deep breath and turned to Steve. "Then I guess I'm ready to go."

He nodded and kissed the top of Sawyer's head before passing him over to his Grandma.

"You be a good boy tonight, okay?" He told his son. Sawyer simply smiled in response before grabbing his grandma's hair.

After letting Allison say a quick goodbye as well, Steve dragged her out the door.

"They're going to be fine," He assured her. "My mom knows what she's doing."

"I know, but this is the first time I've ever left him. He's used to having me around and I'm used to being there."

"Just try not to let it ruin your night," Steve smiled as he opened the door of his truck for her.

"Oh, I think the company will take care of that one," Allison teased.

"Hey! I am great company!" Steve protested. "And you better watch what you say or dinner will be on you."

Allison gasped dramatically.

"After a comment like that, I'd say this date is off to a horrible start!"

"Darn," Steve smiled. "Well at least it can only get better from here."

Allison nodded and Steve quickly shut her door before going around to the driver's side.

* * *

"No, I'm not gonna tell you!" Allison giggled later that evening as her and Steve ate their meal. He had once again taken her to one of the more fancy restaurants in town, despite her protests, but so far things had been going well.

"Please?" Steve begged. "Why is it such a secret?"

"It's not a secret, it's a surprise." Allison clarified. "You can find out on Halloween what Sawyer's dressing up as."

"Can I at least have a hint?" Steve asked, pleased with how easy the conversation was flowing between them.

"Nope, but he's gonna look so cute,"

"Of course he will," Steve smirked. "We made him."

"Yeah," Allison laughed, taking a sip of her drink. "Probably the only good thing to come out of our relationship."

"Don't say that, we were good together."

"Good?" Allison raised an eyebrow. "I wouldn't say that. We fought constantly, all I ever did was worry about you when you were at work and I almost died just because I was your girlfriend."

"You worried when I was at work?" Steve asked, slightly surprised by her confession.

"Of course I did. With your stupid hero complex, I know you always lead the charge and put yourself ahead of your team and I know that means you'll always be the first to get hurt."

"I don't have a hero complex," Steve rolled his eyes. "If I put myself ahead of my team because they are _my _team. It's my job."

"Well what about the times you went without your team?" Allison asked, her tone conveying her obvious bitterness.

"I went to Korea by myself because it was a favour to a friend and dragging the team would have drawn too much attention and I went after Wo Fat to protect my family. That wasn't anything to do with the team and I couldn't put them in danger for my personal mission."

"But what if something happened to you, Steven? It's not safe running off without your team and then where would your family be? Sawyer would grow up without a father and I would lose the man I love." Allison tried to keep her tone civil, but could feel herself getting worked up over the topic once again.

Sensing her shift in mood, Steve reached over and gently rested his hand on hers.

"That's what I don't get about this whole thing." Steve said calmly. "You're upset because you could've lost me on one of those missions, but because you're holding it against me and pushing me away, you're going to lose me anyway."

"I was upset because you took off, after I thought we had agreed that you wouldn't, and left me a stupid letter because you didn't have the balls to face me," Allison clarified. "But it was supposed to hurt less this way," She continued, her voice quieter, as if embarrassed by her words. "I thought if I broke it off the feelings would eventually fade and it wouldn't be my problem anymore if you didn't come back from one of your crazy missions."

"And how's that working out?" Steve asked, knowing her feelings for him were still there.

"It's not," She sighed. "I still love you and, as a friend pointed out, I'm not gonna move on if I still see you when you visit Sawyer."

"So what are you planning on doing about this?" Steve asked cautiously, silently praying she wasn't drifting back to the idea of taking Sawyer away.

"I have no fucking idea." Allison groaned. "I can't keep you from seeing Sawyer. I know now that it was stupid of me to think I should. But even if I still have feelings for you, I don't know if I'm strong enough to deal with the worry that comes along with being your girlfriend."

"But if you're going to worry anyway, isn't it better to at least know that when I do come home safe at the end of the day, I'm coming home to you?" Steve asked, trying to steer her towards making the decision he selfishly thought was best.

"I guess," Allison nodded, subconsciously squeezing his hand slightly. "But what am I supposed to do if you don't come home?"

"I promise that I will always come home, Ally."

"You can't make a promise like that, Steve!" Allison said, her voice filled with frustration. "In your line of work and with all your stupid missions, there's a good chance that one day you won't come home."

"Well I know what I want." Steve told her, knowing that arguing in the middle of the restaurant wouldn't solve anything. "So the choice is yours. Give me one more chance and we can try to work through our problems and be a family or don't, and we can both move on."

"I have to think about it," Allison told him after a moment of silence. Steve nodded and another awkward silence came between them. Feeling slightly uncomfortable after the shift in mood, Allison carefully pulled her hand away from Steve's before picking at her dinner.

* * *

The rest of the dinner and the ride back to Allison's house was filled with an awkward silence. Steve hadn't meant for the night to take such a turn for the worse, but he hadn't lost hope yet as it was quite obvious that Allison was quiet mostly due to the fact that she was weighing out the pros and cons of her options.

When they finally pulled up outside her house, they got out of the car and walked towards the building without saying a word.

"Well," Allison said finally breaking the silence when they arrived at her door. "I guess I'll see you tomorrow when I come get Sawyer."

Steve nodded.

"Thanks for coming tonight," He said sincerely. "And let me know when you make your decision."

Before Allison could stop him, Steve pressed a soft kiss to her cheek and turned, quickly walking back towards his truck. However, after a moment of nervous indecision, she knew what she really wanted to do.

"Steve, wait!" She called before quickly running after him.

As if he was expecting this to happen, Steve stopped instantly and turned back to Allison. Allison, who wasn't as prepared for his reaction, couldn't stop as quickly and crashed into him.

"Yes, Allison?" Steve asked with a smirk as he caught her before she could fall to the ground.

"I think...Uh, I mean...well..." Allison stumbled over her words, not sure just how to say what she wanted to. "Oh, fuck it."

With that, Allison stretched up and pressed her lips against Steve's. At first he was caught by surprise, but wasted no time adjusting to the new situation as he pulled Allison even closer, kissing her back with equal passion.

"We still have things to work out," Allison reminded Steve as he slowly, but surely backed her up towards the front door, not letting her out of his grasp.

"I know," Steve agreed before kissing her again. However, Allison pulled away again, wanting to talk while she was still able to resist the temptation that was now overpowering her.

"And I don't entirely trust you not to break my heart, but," Allison gasped as Steve kissed her neck. "I'm willing to try."

"Mm, that's good." Steve whispered in her ear. "I won't let you down."

"Fuck," Allison groaned, overwhelmed by how quickly things had escalated and just how badly she wanted what was about to happen. "Do you want to come inside?"

Steve grinned and pulled away so Allison could get out her keys.

"I thought you'd never ask."

* * *

**Author's note: Woo! I'm finally updating at a decent rate again. Hopefully I can keep it up and hopefully you all enjoy this part :)**


	9. Chapter 9

"Ally, please take that costume off our poor son," Steve requested as he looked down at his three-month old son with a smile. "He looks ridiculous."

Sawyer simply stared back at his father, a smile on his face as well despite the fact that he was currently dressed in a seal costume that was complete with a little baby sized Navy shirt.

"But he's a Navy Seal!" Allison giggled. "He's like you!"

"Please tell me you didn't take him out anywhere,"

"Of course not. No one would give a three-month old baby candy," She pointed out. "The costume is just to take pictures for the relatives so they can see how he spent his first Halloween."

"Well I think he's suffered long enough. I'm pretty sure this is considered child abuse," Steve exaggerated as he moved to free his child from the costume.

"No, it's not!" Allison protested as she stopped him. "He looks adorable."

"I have to agree with the lady," Kamekona piped up as he walked in wearing an army costume. "That is one cute costume. But how do I look?"

"Like you're ready to report to Seal team nine," Steve told him, momentarily distracted.

"For real?"

"For real," Steve confirmed.

"Because I was thinking, if you let me borrow some smoke grenades then I'd really look legit."

Steve looked at him for a moment, as if almost considering it, before shaking his head.

"No, no. We discussed that earlier, no heavy ordnance."

"Well then could I at least borrow the pretty lady?" Kamekona asked. "A hot date might distract from my lack of authenticity."

Steve shook his head, but with a smirk, Allison spoke up.

"Ooh, that sounds like fun,"

"What? You can't go," Steve insisted. "You don't even have a costume."

"Oh please. I'm a girl," Allison reminded him. "All I'd have to do is throw on some cat ears and lingerie and I'd be good to go."

Steve stared at her as if she was insane before turning to Kamekona again.

"No, you can't steal my date," He said firmly. "We have plans tonight."

"We do?" Allison asked as Kamekona picked a VHS up off the table.

"You've heard of Blu-ray, right?" He asked Steve as he looked it over.

"Yeah, but I rented that in the ninth grade with Jenny Feldman and it's been a Halloween tradition ever since." Kamekona nodded as Steve explained. "So, uh, you good to go?" Steve asked, obviously trying to get the other man to leave so he could get some time alone with his family. However, Kamekona seemed to have other ideas.

"Well why don't you put it on? This looks interesting, brah."

"Don't you got a party to get to?" Steve asked quietly, trying to subtly make his point.

The hint was lost on Kamekona though and Allison giggled as he replied with a shrug.

"Yeah, pretty soon."

"Hey, hey, hey. Don't you got a party to get to?" Steve repeated with a little more emphasis this time.

"Oh, indeed I do." Kamekona said, finally clueing in. "You two have a wonderful evening."

Allison smiled and thanked him as she picked up Sawyer from his little swing.

"Well I guess I should take this little one out of his costume and let him get some sleep or he'll be a grumpy guy in the morning," She said, giggling as Sawyer flapped his little arms which were encased in flippers.

"Ah!" He shouted, smiling back at her.

"I don't know what your problem is," Allison told Steve. "I think he likes it. And you should be proud, he's obviously headed down the same path as you."

"I don't know if that's a good thing or not," Steve chuckled. "And my 'path' certainly didn't start in anything like that ridiculous outfit."

Before Allison could object to Steve's continued ridicule of Sawyer's costume, someone banged on the door and rang the door bell. Startled by the sound, Sawyer jumped and instantly started to cry.

"Shit," She muttered, gently rocking Sawyer. "We should cover the doorbell or it's gonna be a long night."

Steve nodded, but opened the door as Allison comforted their son. However, unlike he had expected, there were no children on the doorstep, but instead was his obviously agitated partner.

"She ditched me!" He fretted, barging in the door. "My own daughter ditched me. It's Halloween, we're supposed to go trick or treating, but she says "Dad, is it okay if I go with my friends instead?" and what am I supposed to do? Say "No, I command you to spend Halloween with your father."? Wait, that doesn't sound so bad, I should've said that." Danny ranted before sitting on the couch and looking over at Allison. "And what on earth is that poor child wearing?"

"He's a Navy Seal," Allison grinned, still proud of the outfit.

"That is cruel," Danny told her bluntly before running a hand through his hair in an attempt to calm himself down.

Steve however, was getting sick of all the interruptions so, holding the door open with one hand, he grabbed the bowl of candy off the table with the other.

"Hey, want some candy?" He asked, shaking the bowl slightly to get his attention.

"No, I don't want any candy," Danny replied, looking at his partner as if he was insane. "Can I have a beer?"

"A beer?"

"Yeah, what's the matter with you?"

"Okay," Steve sighed before tossing the candy back on the table and closing the door with slightly more force than necessary before walking to the kitchen.

Allison smiled at Steve's frustration before sitting next to the other man, sitting Sawyer on her lap. Danny looked over and smiled slightly.

"Come to Uncle Danno and we'll get you out of that crazy get-up." He said as he reached over and took the baby. As he tried to wrestle Sawyer out of his costume, he continued his rant. "I know it's my fault. It's all those times that I had to bail on her because of work, she has learned that it's acceptable to be unreliable."

"No, I'm sure that's not it, Danny." Allison assured him. "Grace is getting older now and hanging out with her friends has just become more appealing than spending time with her parents. That doesn't make her unreliable and you're not an unreliable father."

Danny was just about to respond when Steve came back into the room.

"Where's the beer?" Danny asked, sounding disappointed.

"No beer, we're on duty." He said as he fastened his gun onto his belt.

"Great, we caught a case. I had ten minutes to spend with my daughter when I picked her up from her sleepover. Ten minutes. Now I'll have to call Rachel and ask her to do that."

"Nah, I got it." Allison promised him.

"Really?"

"Yeah, just text me the address. I haven't seen Grace in forever, it would be nice to spend some time with her. "

"I know how you feel," Danny muttered before thanking her again.

"Don't wait up," Steve told her as he leaned in for a quick kiss. "And you be a good boy for your mom." He said to his son.

Sawyer smiled up at the two men before they headed out the door.


	10. Chapter 10

Late one night a couple of weeks after Halloween, Allison was dozing in her bed when she heard the sound of footsteps in the hall. She felt her heart rate quicken, but due to her half asleep state, she assured herself that she must have been dreaming. However, when the door to her bedroom slowly began to open she froze in complete panic.

A million thoughts ran through her mind. Was it Wo Fat? How did he even find her? Should she fight her way to Sawyer's room or would that just draw attention towards him? She was still frantically trying to come up with a plan when she heard a voice through the darkness.

"Ally? Are you awake?" Steve asked quietly.

Allison breathed a sigh of relief before quickly sitting up in her bed.

"Jesus, Steve!" She scolded. "You scared the shit out of me! How'd you even get in here?"

"I have a key," He said like it was obvious.

"Since when?!"

"Since always," He confessed. "I've had one since you moved in. Just a precautionary measure, I wouldn't have used it without your permission."

"Until tonight, apparently."

Steve carefully sat on the edge of the bed next to Allison. Even through the darkness she could see that something was bothering him and as his tired eyes met her, she calmed herself down.

"I'm sorry, I just wanted to see you and didn't want to call in case I woke Sawyer up," He explained.

"That's okay," Allison said, suddenly more concerned about what was wrong. "I'm just a little paranoid still, I guess. Anyway, what's up? Why'd you have to see me so bad?"

"It was a rough day," He admitted, putting his hand on her leg. "Really rough."

"With that whole terrorist threat? I'm not surprised. But I thought you solved that pretty fast?"

"We did, but then we found the guy orchestrating the whole thing and Danny took him down, but," Steve sighed. "He had a bomb strapped to his chest with a motion sensor on it. Danno almost died."

"Oh my god," Allison reached out and squeezed his hand. "Is he okay?"

"Yeah, a little stressed, but he's fine. Even made it out in time to take Grace to her father-daughter dance." He smiled. "I just felt so helpless, you know? There was nothing I could do to help him. And I've been at HQ doing paperwork for this whole mess all night and I couldn't stop thinking about what I would've done if today had ended differently."

Allison smiled and leaned forward, placing a kiss on his cheek before sliding over slightly and throwing back the covers.

"You can sleep here tonight," She told him. He nodded and pulled his shirt over his head as Allison continued. "And that's just another one of your occupational hazards. Sometimes you're going to be in situations you can't control where people you care about are in danger, but you just have to get through it the best you can. Dwelling on what could've happened will drive you insane, Steve."

Now just in his boxers, Steve climbed into bed and pulled Allison into his arms.

"I know, but it's hard not to. It was so close. Really touch and go for a while there."

"And I bet you stayed by his side the whole time," Allison smiled, knowing Steve.

"I did," He admitted. "But he's part of my team, and my partner. I couldn't just leave him there all alone, ready to die."

"I know, and I wouldn't expect anything less from you," She assured him, placing a kiss on his chest.

The couple fell into silence, simply comforted by the feeling of each other's heartbeat, and just when Steve thought for sure that Allison had fallen asleep, she spoke again.

"This is how I feel every day you know," She told her boyfriend, confusing him slightly.

"What?"

"Every day when you leave for work I feel exactly like you did today," She explained. "I know you get yourself into dangerous, life threatening situations and I know there's absolutely nothing I can do to help you. This is what I meant when I said that I worried about you all the time and didn't know if I could handle it anymore."

"But if you dwell on what could've happen, it would drive you insane." Steve said, slowly realizing how Allison had come up with that clever piece of advice.

"Exactly," Allison nodded against his chest. "I want to be with you and I know that worrying about you is a part of that. So I'm trying my best to trust that you and your team know what you're doing and you'll be safe."

"We do know what we're doing," Steve promised. "And coming home safely to you and Sawyer is always a priority for me."

"I know."

"I love you, Ally." Steve whispered, letting his eyes slip closed as he began to relax.

"I love you too, Steve." She replied before sighing sleepily. "And I'm glad Danno's okay. Give him a hug for me tomorrow."

Steve chuckled and pulled her close.

"Yeah, okay. I will."

Allison giggled quietly as they both drifted into a peaceful sleep.


	11. Chapter 11

"Hello?" Allison called out into what appeared to be an empty Five-0 headquarters. She was surprised to find the place so deserted seeing as all their cars were still parked in the parking lot outside and walked a little further inside to investigate.

"Ah, ahhh!" Sawyer called out too as if he was trying to help. Allison smiled, adjusting the baby's position on her hip and as she got closer to Steve's office she saw Kono, Danny and Steve in the middle of what looked like a serious discussion.

"Is this a bad time?" She asked, poking her head in after knocking gently on the glass door.

"No, no," Danny assured her. "You arrived just in time to see your boyfriend get served with a restraining order from the woman that he is currently harassing."

"Ooh, should I be jealous?" Allison teased, hoping to ease the tension slightly.

"No, you shouldn't. This woman is behind two murders and obviously this is just an attempt to put distance between us. I can't arrest her if I'm not allowed within five hundred yards of her."

"If you know she did it, why haven't you arrested her already?" Allison asked, sighing as Sawyer clamped his little fingers in her hair. She tried to pry them off as Danny answered.

"Because he can't prove it. He had a hunch and this woman got under his skin so he's convicted her on the basis that he simply does not like her."

"You know that's not true, Danny. This woman is guilty." Steve argued. "What are you doing here anyway, Ally?"

Unhappy with his mother's refusal to let him grasp painfully onto her hair, Sawyer kicked his legs in frustration and began whimpering, a clear sign a tantrum was about to follow. Allison sighed again and switched him to her other hip.

"I'm here because this little monster has been a grumpy pain in the ass all day and I have a sneaking suspicion that it might have something to do with the fact that he hasn't seen his father in almost a week." She explained, bouncing Sawyer in an attempt to keep his mood up. "I thought maybe we could go for lunch or something, but obviously now isn't a good time."

"No, it's not," Steve agreed. "But, while Danny tries to figure out how to get Olivia Victor on the no fly list, I do need to talk to you."

"They no fly list?!" Danny asked incredulously. "How the hell am I supposed to do that?"

"Use my connections! I can't get involved, but she's gonna leave the country, Danno. I'll bet my life on that."

"You are insane. You have officially lost your mind," Danno muttered to himself before storming out of the office.

Sawyer was momentarily distracted by Danny's outburst, but once he was gone he went back to his whimpering.

"Sawyer," Allison said to her four-month old son. "I think Daddy needs to have a serious discussion with Mommy so I'm gonna need you to stop whining at me for at least the next twenty minutes. Can you do that?"

However, Sawyer seemed to ignore her request and simply stared back at her, still whining. Kono smiled from her spot near the door before stepping forward.

"I don't have any seriously pressing work at the moment, I don't mind watching him for a few minutes while you two chat." She offered.

"That would be amazing," Allison said with relief. "But, Steve, you're gonna have to make this quick because Sawyer probably won't behave for long."

As she spoke she passed the baby over to Kono who took him eagerly. Luckily he was distracted enough by the new face, complete with earrings and long hair to grab at, that he seemed to calm down and didn't make a fuss as Kono carried him out the room, cooing at him as she went.

* * *

Once Kono and Sawyer were out of the room, Allison walked over to Steve and put her arms around his neck.

"So what's up, Sailor? You seem tense," She told him. "And you have that aneurysm face Danno teases you about. Sawyer has one too. I can always tell when he's about to throw a tantrum."

Steve chuckled slightly, his grumpy face fading slightly.

"Really? Are you sure he didn't just inherit that face you get when you're pissed off?" He teased.

"Yes, I'm sure." Allison giggled. "But anyway, what's wrong?"

"This case is just getting to me," He sighed. "I know she did it and she's messing with me. I hate that."

"Awe," Allison stretched up and kissed him. "I'm sure you'll figure out a way to get her. You always do."

Steve nodded, but was obviously still troubled.

"I'm also frustrated because I know what I'm about to tell you is going to upset you."

Allison tensed before pulling her arms away from Steve.

"I swear to God if you say you're going to some dangerous country on some dangerous mission I will walk out that door and never come back." There was a hint of dramatic exaggeration in her words, but her face gave away how serious she was.

"No, no, I promise that's not it," Steve assured her. "But you have to move out of the safe house."

"What? Why?" Allison asked, confused. "Wo Fat is still out there."

"Yes, but he's disappeared completely off the radar so the governor doesn't feel he is a direct threat anymore and there are other people who are in more immediate danger that need a place to live."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Allison tried to wrap her head around what he was telling her. "What if he's just lying low until we let our guards down and Sawyer and I become a more accessible target?"

"I thought that too, but the governor pointed out that Doris has been wandering around Hawaii for a while now and she's been fine."

"That doesn't mean we'll be safe too," She pointed out. "But fuck, Steve. Where are we supposed to go?!"

Steve took a deep breath and prepared himself for the negative reaction he knew he would get from his next suggestion.

"You could move in with me."

Allison stared at him for a moment before laughing.

"Oh wow, Steven. Are you really putting my safety and your son's safety at risk just to try to convince me to move in with you again?"

"First of all, your safety would not be at risk if you lived with me. In fact you'd probably be safer than you are now." Steve informed her. "And secondly, just think about it! It would make everything easier. I'd be able to see Sawyer every day no matter how busy work is so he'd be less grumpy, I could help out when he wakes up at night so you'd get more rest, my mom would be right there in the day if you ever need a break and most of your stuff is still there anyway."

Allison chewed on her lip as she pondered his reasons. They were all true and having more help with Sawyer was very appealing, but something inside her was still holding her back.

"I think we're moving too fast, Steve."

Steve rolled his eyes.

"I'm pretty sure that's exactly what you said last time I asked you to move in," He reminded her. "And we have a child now, I don't see how moving in together would be moving too fast."

"Because, Steven," Allison started feeling her frustrations rise at Steve's attitude. "We may have a child, but you seem to have forgotten that less than two months ago I wasn't sure I wanted anything to do with you. Going from that to living together in such a short time is moving pretty fast if you ask me."

"But it's the best option," Steve insisted. "And pretty much the only one if you ask me."

Allison sighed and crossed her arms, shaking her head.

"I don't know, Steve." She told him. "I'm gonna have to think about it."

"Yeah," Steve nodded, trying to be patient. "Okay."

As Steve finished talking, Sawyer's cries filled the headquarters.

"Well, I guess I should go," Allison said, sighing again.

Without waiting for Steve to reply, she turned and left his office, pondering her options as she went to save Kono from her son.


End file.
